Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
