What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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