How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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