Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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