D3 body, D1 cock
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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