what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
