vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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