Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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