Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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