I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
