i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
