Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize