Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
