After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
