whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Randomize
