Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Having a random hookup so left but love u
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize