i barfeds in our rink
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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