Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
These tits shall not be calmed
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
