I got her a Nickelback box set.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
