Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
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