I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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