and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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