i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
