I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I just had sex on a roof
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
