I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Redeem this text for a blowjob
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
