Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
