Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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