take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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