I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
