She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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