Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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