i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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