But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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