note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
