I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
My dick has a subreddit
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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