If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
