Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize