I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
