I bet he comes in French.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
