Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
just tell him i said nine months
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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