You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize