We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
i think i just lost a toe
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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