I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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