So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
It's rum buckets o'clock
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
