I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
