Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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