am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I wish you could order shots online.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
