Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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