yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
