If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
