I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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